Final Week of NaNoWriMo

   There are only a few days left of NaNoWriMo, which is sad, and a relief.  There is always this hope, and excitement I am greeted with on November 1st that by the end of the month is long gone. As I read over my story I am sure I will find the remains of what a tornado left.
   For one I am not the best planner in the world. There is an outline of this novel sitting in a notebook tablet, but all my plans were took over by my intent on just writing whatever came to mind when I started. Then something happened and I switched from first to third person narrative. I have decided I like writing in it much better than first. The thing I am absolutely exhausted of the story, and have decided that if I continue writing in future NaNoWriMo that I will need to really change my approach because I am just not writing anything worth editing.
   I still have around 8,000 words to write before Wednesday, and I feel confident that I can finish if I stay focused. I want to write scenes that only apply to my story though. There are huge gaps of me rambling in my story, which will have to be cut out.
   I'm still making the attempt. I am also going to try to make a better commitment to only writing things that pertain to my story. Not to say that I won't drift and write other stuff, but my focus is to get as much of this story done as possible. I feel like the more I write just garbage to just be writing the further I get away from ever finishing this story though. As you can see by this blog post I can barely think of enough words to ever write about my story.

My Second Week of NaNoWriMo

   Now I am arriving upon my second week of the challenge, and though at the beginning of the week I thought I might be rounding the bend for an easier week that was quickly squashed. I think I had two spots in this week where I didn't even meet where I should be for the goal for the day.
    I keep thinking about how I should press myself to stay late tonight to write till 20K, but I'm certain by the end of the day I will be there. I have no idea how to get any inspiration to write though. I actually want to go back and begin editing another novel that I have. Maybe I could do that and count it to my word count.
   I was very scared to begin writing this novel, so I think when I started it overwhelmed me.  I had such huge expectations for a first draft and that just isn't possible.
   Will this next week go better? I certainly hope so. I have nothing fantastic to report, nor do I even have an excerpt that absolutely catches me which is a first. I usually always have one scene that I love to share, but that just isn't the case this time, or not yet.

My First Week of NaNoWriMo

   It's almost been a week of writing, and it seems that I'm not the only one who hit a plato of problems once beginning.  My motivation was zero when the time to write finally happened Tuesday. I'm hoping this rebounds, but so far I'm struggling pretty bad with the first chapters. Twitter seems to claim that other fellow WriMos are in the same boat, and if I read correctly the "NaNoWriMo Ate My Soul" thread has over 800 posts compared to the "This Is Going Better Than I Hoped" thread at almost 200 posts.
  I'm not sure why this was the first year I didn't bust out of the gate on my idea with all the excitement I usually have. Nothing was different than past year's when I started, but I just didn't feel as thrilled as I usually do. The idea is one of the best ones I've had, and there are days when I look forward to writing it, and there are others where I'm forcing myself.  The biggest concern is that when it comes time to edit in December is that it will be completely be something that I can't edit.
   Maybe I've just had a lot working against me as far current happenings, and my allergies getting to me. I don't know if something will kick in the last half of the month and give me what I need to get through it.
   I'm obviously not the only one struggling though, and if you are someone who is also having difficulty getting through then take comfort in the fact I'm in the same boat too!

Editing Fade to Farewell, while Plotting the novel, Absolution

Image from sxc.hu by nazreth

    I'm not sure if it is a great idea to edit one novel, while trying to plan another. I tend to be someone who can only get into one idea at a time, but I have this feeling to ever successfully publish that I need to be able to work with two ideas at one time.
     Last year for National Novel Writing Month I wrote my favorite novel of the 3 years I've participated. I titled it, Fade to Farewell. My love for the title was enough to keep me motivated to keep writing even when I didn't want to. This novel seriously felt like my lifeline last November after I suffered a pretty rough time.  I remember there were days it was even painful to write down parts of the stories that were more like memories to me. The most awful thing happened when my laptop crashed, and I lost over half the novel since it was not backed up yet. It was the roughest NaNoWriMo I've experienced by far! You can imagine how much I wanted this novel to see the light of day after all that work.  Somewhere along the way I became very tempted to shelf it, and forget it. All of a sudden I figured it could be rescued. If I keep throwing away things because I thought they were impossible to edit then I will never see a novel of mine make it. Right now my goal is to edit a chapter a day.
     Another round of NaNoWriMo also begins next month. Meaning I have another novel idea to roll out titled, Absolution. I want to plot slightly better than I have in the past, and at least know what I need to write from day to day. I have around eight ideas charted now, and my goal is to fit a certain amount of words, or more into each chapter. I also feel I should do some character planning to make everything seem stronger. My motivation is wavering between these two novels though so it makes each difficult to get into at different times.
    I'm a little bit concerned at my wavering excitment about the next idea for next month. I know if I kick myself into gear I can do it though. I like to think of the scenes that first introduced me to the idea, and made me want to write, which leaves me forgetting the larger story I need to hash out. The more I write the more pressure I feel to make it good. Though that leaves room for me to improve over last year it also puts pressure on me not to fail.  I'm trying to feel encouraged as much as I can, but I feel like so much is working against me.

My National Novel Writing Month Project

   I finally decided what novel I would be writing in November. I debated between several ideas I've had for a couple of years now, but I don't want to write anything until I have the one that has been at the forefront completed. I've attempted this idea before, but I want to scrap all previous attempts at it, and start fresh.
   I've titled the novel, Absolution, and I finally wrote what I think is a decent synopsis for it. As soon as the forums restart I can't wait to upload all the information for it! I want to share a what I've decided to do for this novel though.
   The first person can be very difficult to write, but when it's done well it's probably one of the best perspectives to read. I've decided I really want to write this novel in first person though. It contains so many feelings that all around surround one guy, and I think to get the full extent of emotions from the novel it should come from him. I thought a while on whether there was anything in the novel that would need a third person perspective, and I concluded that all the action could be told from him.
  As it nears November I'll continue updating about what I'm writing in November, and when I begin writing I hope to give some interesting updates on how it is going. For now I need to motivate myself to plot, so I won't lose track of what I'm writing like I have did before.

Fade to Farewell: Story Behind the Title

 A couple of weeks before National Novel Writing Month began I didn't want to write the story I had originally believed I wanted to. I felt nothing regarding the storyline, and knew that if I attempted to write it I would already be going into it with that major problem facing me. It occured to me that a story suiting what I could most relate to at that time would be the most fulfilling to write. In the end the story became about loss of a variety of things, and dealing with how to say farewell to those things.
    For some reason I really wanted to use the word "farewell". I was reading Ernest Hemingway's A Farewell to Arms at the time, and it occured to me how suiting the word was to sum up my story. I needed something else to fit with "farewell", so for a couple of days I brainstormed a variety of titles I couldn't recall now. None of them were satisfying though. 
      I had been listening to a lot of Iron and Wine that week. There was one song that stood out to me as I listened to it called, "Faded From the Winter". As I was listening to it I realized how reflective the song seemed. The song reminded me of reflecting on memories of those things that you had to say farewell to, and accepting those things as fond memores, but not without the tinge of sadness. The title occured to me immediately after listening to that song. The title from there on was Fade to Farewell. 
    I hadn't encountered such a process when naming a novel before, but the more thought I set aside for, it the more important the story became to me. Farewells are in every aspect of our life, and sometimes we have to learn how to fade to it.

November was a Whirlwind

Since last year's National Novel  Writing Month ended I knew I would write another novel for this year. A little over a month ago I had a totally different idea of what I was going to write. Overall I just had a different expectation of where I would be this month. There were so many setbacks, and so many emotions running through me so the fact I'm sitting here as a winner  of NaNoWriMo is the biggest accomplishment I have felt this year. 
    Obviously my laptop choosing the  final days of of this month to shut down was an awful feeling. I was sitting at my laptop feeling comfortable with my 44K on Sunday when all of a sudden it was just gone. 20K was gone, but it was  not over.  I needed this novel to help me get through what I was going through. I didn't  realize how much I was depending on this novel to keep me going as I struggled through this month.  
    As you can on the sidebar, I had a red box for one day. I'll be honest Friday was probably the worst day of this month I had. I almost gave up on my novel because I could think of no  reason to  write it. The news I had received that day basically conveyed to me that what I was attempting to let go of in my novel was a lapse of time that only I considered significant. I forced myself on though only to realize this wasn't just about me.
    There were other people suffering through the same thing, and feeling the same obstacle  I  was.  It wasn't just me  alone trying to move along in life. That's basically what carried me on in writing this novel, because someone else would  be able to read it, and realize the exact same thing I did also. Another reason I continued to write is because I needed to give what happened to me some meaning. I wantedit  to be more than it turned out, and I wanted it to have purpose. It was something too notable to just let slip by, and only become a memory.
    There were many moments after I wrote a scene that I felt depleted. It was as if I had taken every bit of me to recall all my feelings, and energy I had put into times I was having to recall. There were other moments where I would reread a scene, and  be amazed that I could read and feel what I felt exactly as I was then. Some days would come along, and I would force myself to write.  Along with that I would retrieve my playlist I had made, listen to it no matter how painful it was just so I could relive what I needed to make this novel feel real despite the fact it was fiction. I'll admit there were tears, and smiles as I wrote this novel.
    It was a rough month, but in it I found I found hope. I know though if those things hadn't ever happened then this novel would have never came to be.  This novel is about so many things. It's about growing up, breakups, doubt,hope, and love. It is about life.
    I truly can't wait to begin editing this novel. It isn't finished but I feel it's a diamond in the rough, at least if to no one else it is to me. Hopefully you'll be able to read about Tyler and Rebekah's journey in the future. I can't wait to share it.

For now here is an excerpt of the first chapter from Fade to Farewell if you are interested in a glimpse of what is in store. http://www.box.net/shared/3uu1e9x68a

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I'm thankful for the support I recieved this month too! It really helped me cross the finish line to win NaNoWriMo. 

50,000 Words and 18 Bands: Bon Iver

As you can see on the right, I've made it to the halfway point of 25,000 words. Now only 25,00o more words to go. I was hoping to post more often about the bands I was listening to while writing, but school work has me behind. For this post though I'm going to introduce Bon Iver.

Bon Iver's songs pefectly fit the mood of the novel. The somber atmosphere sets it up well when preparing to write. I think when you listen to music that you listened to when certian emotions were running through you takes you right back to that instantance you were living that. I suppose that can feel like a good, or bad thing. If you're reliving what you know doesn't exist but still exists with that song, then it's really difficult putting yourself in that mindset again to write. You can check out more at Bon Iver's site

50,000 Words and 18 Bands: Beirut

All through November I'm constantly seeking songs that will drive the scenes I want to bring to life on paper. So far I've accumulated 18 different bands, and multiple songs from each. Whenever I listen to them I can't help but want to write the memories, feelings, characters, and scenes associated with those songs. I may not get around to covering every single band. For now the first one I feel I really want to introduce is Beirut.


When I first heard the band I thought they had a good sound, but I listened once, and then just forgot about the song, "Nantes" for a while. About a month later I remembered the song, and could not stop listening to it. I would wake up first thing in the morning and listen to it, and put it on in my car wherever I went. Recently I found some time to research their music further, and I'm just completely enjoying what I'm hearing. Besides that it has also been a huge help in creating a few scenes for my novel. There are two songs in particular I just keep returning to in particular to keep my novel flowing. Their music also has caused me to begin wishing I kept my trumpet.

You can check out more at Beirut's site.